1. Sally has 3 apples, Shawna has an organically grown grapefruit, Molly has a new Powerpuff Girls pencil case, and Madison’s dad is in substance abuse rehab for the 3rd time in two years. If we assume that your former best-friend Riley has not invited you to her 12th-birthday party (at which, just, everyone else is invited) and you drop Drama Club in favor of getting high with your boyfriend Jayden for most of high school junior year, calculate the rate of change (z) in the encroachment of despair, given that (x) is an essentially useless $200,000 degree in art history from UPenn and (y) is a long-standing and undiagnosed eating disorder.
2. Arrange the following elements according to atomic weight, from smallest to greatest:
c) The inadvisability of mixing Adderall, Ecstasy, and 2 glasses of chardonnay
e) The chances of that asshole Kevin posting that photo of you to Is Anyone Up?
g) The fact that Leah is fucking the Iranian TA in exchange for an A in this class